The past few years I have really focused on working thru past traumas and realizing I'm a daughter of God. Sometimes we lose sight of the fact that we have a Heavenly Father that loves us more than we can ever know. I don't think I really understood this until recently, like really took the time to understand this. For a long time I felt lost, confused, and just really down all the time. I thought this can't be it, this can't be the life I lead. I loved being a mom and a wife but I just couldn't get it together how I wanted. I wanted to feel joy, peace, love, and happiness. I couldn't figure it out until I got on my knees and pleaded to God for help. I decided that if I wanted to change how I felt then I needed to work on it and put effort into it then God could certainly help me along the way. Since deciding this for myself I believe that things have gotten much harder and more challenging in many ways. I had to face head on things that were hard and difficult and I didn't want to do it. I was so ready many times to throw my hands up and say forget it but I didn't and I pushed thru. If I want to be happy then I need to do the work. Now don't get me wrong I have had so many wonderful joyous moments in my life but if you have lived thru trauma half of your life then it takes a tremendous amount of work to get passed them and to be able to let them go. Its not easy and you are not alone in your trials I can attest to that. The mighty miracles that I have experienced lately are more wonderful and joyful than I can express into words. Over a year ago I felt a prompting to write one of the 12 apostles Elder Jeffery R Holland and I always had the thought come into my mind that no way am I going to bother him, I can work all this out on my own. The prompting never left and recently I finally said "OK" and sat down prayerfully and wrote him a letter. I just expressed my gratefulness to him and his service and a little bit about my life and trying to work thru letting go and forgiving. I received a letter back from Elder Holland just 2 weeks later and it was one of the happiest days of my life. He gave me wonderful encouragement and I felt love, compassion, and tenderness from him. I felt the Saviors love for me thru this letter. I didn't mind if nothing came of the letter I sent and I thought I was just doing my part in following thru with a prompting I was trying to ignore. Im so incredibly grateful and I know without a doubt that I'm not alone in anything that I'm trying to achieve. I will follow thru when I receive a prompting( this I have learned).
Look this up:
Book of Mormon
3 Nephi 27:29
